Lil' Hà Nôi 'd

Lil' Hà Nôi 'd

HANOI4.jpg

“Where you from? Where are you FROMMM?” This was the throaty question of the day, or the weekend rather, from the folks encountered in the northern Vietnam city of Hà Nôi, the country’s capital and second largest city by population. “The United States,” I’d answer enthusiastically, “America”, knowing how crazy curious the good Viet kids are about the country they strangely call Mỹ. They’d all gather around as I drew a quick map of the U.S., encircling earth’s largest geographical mitten. “I’m from Michigan,” I’d explain, my home state being clearly decipherable on a rough outline of the states. “Ohhh Mitchigan,” they’d chorus. “Vang (yes). And where are you all from?,” I’d kid them.“We are from Vietnam!” (hi hi laughter all around). In the past post, I recounted good times adventuring with my ban, my good friend, in the south and Vietnam’s central coast. But if a table of contents existed to the story of my love affair with VN, Phuc wouldn’t show up until Chapter Two. The opening scene would then center on another character – my American friend Aaron James Everhart –Advertising Executive, entrepreneur and Hà Nôi resident since 2005.

Allow me first to take a few steps back, back up the street of Nguyen Dinh Chieu, and explain what brought me to Vietnam in the first place. Prior to my first life-altering jaunt to southeast Asia in December 2007, I’d been the student of a powerful Native American Healer and Medicine Man. In life, we tend to become the person others see us as. But when you’re unseen, when you’re a ghost in the midst of your own people and a little haunted, you’re fairly content being a nothing and becoming no one. Even if you’re born with a ton of talent, that doesn’t matter and in fact makes it all worse, as talented, unsuccessful people in our world are practically proverbs. I was on the road to nowhere, and, like many, life for me was turning out to be nothing but a veil of tears. Fortunately, an Indian Chief saw me, and when he saw me, he really saw me. From the first time I shook his hand, connecting with a real spiritual teacher, the road I was on abruptly ended, and a new road began. Almost two decades later, with many twists and turns, I’m still trudging that same road. And although challenging on a daily basis, I wouldn’t have it any other way, as it’s a life that gets better and better with time, slowly but surely leading to a happiness beyond my own imagining.

My Chief was the love of my life for seven years, a time during which he introduced me to his sacred, Ceremonial way of living. I didn’t care about a whole lot then other than ending my psychic pain, spending extended time on the reservation learning and doing Ceremony. After a few years, I experienced a Hanblecheya Ceremony, a vision quest, Hanble in his language meaning a dream or a vision, and Cheya meaning to cry, hence Crying for a Vision. Going on the Hill as they call it is a four-day Ceremony where one is isolated in the wilderness with no food and no water. Orchestrating this near-death experience and dissolution of the ego helps resolve one’s understanding of what death truly is, and can provide a glimpse forward or back, into one’s own future or past. My experiences on the Hill are other stories in themselves, and if you have an interest, you can read up on what I jokingly call The Great Lakota Weight Loss Program on my old blog here. On with this current account, one of the visions I experienced clearly pointed me toward the country of Vietnam. The Chief, being a robust, authentic Shaman, also suffered many of the health problems of the rough and tumble Native world, being a smoker, former alcoholic and victim of fetal alcohol syndrome. He suffered a stroke in the summer of 2005, and in January 2006 took an untimely, early departure for the World of the Spirit. He was the world to me as well as the world to come for those seven years and then he was gone, and I refer to the period in my life afterward as The Great Return to Civilization. In retrospect, however, there wasn’t anything great about it; not knowing what to do next, I moved from the American Southwest to San Francisco and did my best to return to my former life as an ad copywriter.

At that time, Aaron James Everheart serendipitously entered the scene. I did a gig for a graphic design firm, the owner of which had recently returned from a whirlwind tour through Vietnam. Back to semi-stumbling my way through life, I remembered my vision and was all ears and questions. “The whole trip was inspired by a buddy who lives in Hà Nôi and works for Grey Advertising,” he explained. “He’s a good guy, I’ll give you his e-mail.” And the rest, as they say, is lich sú (history). Aaron’s generous response blew me away. He told me where to go, who to contact and what to do, i.e., “Take the overnight train to Sapa and stay at the Dutch Eco Lodge.” Sapa lies in the country’s northern mountains, a hamlet filled with colorful examples of the 54 minority group that populate the country. The district is one of the few in VN where Hmong people compose the majority, followed by the Yao, Kinh, Tay, Day and Xa Pho. If you’ll recall, a traditional healer of a North American tribe set me on the road that really leads somewhere. My thoughts go back to walking those mounatinous dirt roads for the first time absolutely elated, and on two subsequent trips I lined up home stays, even allowed to attend and experience the healing Ceremonies of Red Szao Shamans. A bunch of other weird, wonderful occurrences while there confirmed my spiritual growth would continue, as it has on this trip and does to this very day. 

Back to the now continuously and 2019, I hadn’t talked to Aaron since Hà Nôi’s 1,000 year birthday celebration in 2010. But I’m happy to report that when he did respond, he was as generous as he was from the start. Funny that he admittedly paces himself, in his words replying to digital messages at the swiftness of postal mail, which is certainly appropriate for a Hà Nôi resident. When we finally did cross paths, we of course went for street food, meeting up at the intersection of Hang Bong and Phuc Duan streets. The food on that corner is of the caliber that can still call to the Spirit of Anthony Bourdain, who said of Vietnam: “It grabs you and it doesn’t let you go. Once you love it, you love it Forever.” True Thật. As an aside, check out Bourdain’s Vietnam:There’s No Place Like Home, a title I can certainly relate to. It that wasn’t cool enough, Aaron invited me to his place later in the weekend and whipped up Fire Cracker Pork Fusilli, nothing delighting like a home-cooked meal when you’re 7,982 miles away. We explored some night life — something I rarely do and thoroughly enjoyed- and of course had some laughs. I’ll always recall Aaron first conveying Ha noi’s mystique- the exotic, echoing car horn, the slant of the moonlight, the mysterious fog that shrouds the city. The joke this trip was that it’s actually not romantic fog — it’s pollution. It really is. Hanging in Hà Nôi previously almost always led to flu-like symptoms, and I simply chalked it up to the miles traveled, the lack of sleep, the hustle to the other side of the world. But on this trip, just walking across town bloodied my eyes, scratched my throat raw and gave me a hacking cough, like I’d been sucking on motorbike exhaust, which I’d indirectly been doing. Even that couldn’t completely dissipate the towns’ old-world charm. I still love it, and its congestion and lack of emission standards can’t kill the fact that it’s one of the coolest towns in Vietnam if not the entire world. 

Which brings us around full circle to Hoan Kiem Lake, to the Viet kids and amusing exchanges that opened this story. Lake of the Restored Sword is a fresh body of water in the historical center of the town, one of the city’s major scenic spots and focal point of its public life. Older folks practice Tai Chi, con gais (girls) folk dance, kids rip skateboarding ollies and play a game called Da Cãu, kicking the Trái Cáu, a feathered, Vietnamese version of America’s Hacky Sack, all adding to the lake’s vibrant scene. I took my jump rope and walked about, a big, bearded American guy leaping around being a funny addition to the mix. This visit there was also a wonderful new development, as at least a half-dozen young women approached me, each with a group of children ages six to about twelve. “May my students practice their English with you?”, the con gais would eagerly ask. I was psyched, because I’m good with kids and good with English and so adore the Vietnamese people, I couldn’t have orchestrated a more heartening scenario. I asked them their name, their age, and how many brothers and sisters they had. They in turn wanted to know where I was from, what sports I liked and how old I was. One boy named Tuan was so sweet, when I told him, “I am old, I am fifty-one!”, he responded: “You’re not old, you are young! And you are funny and you are smart!” I didn’t think seeing a big American man cry would behoove Tuan’s learning, so I feigned blowing my nose, and sent him on his way, telling him, “You’re one of the best English speakers I’ve met all day,” because every child in this world is special and deserves that kind of edification. 

There you have it. That’s why every time I grab my bags at Tan Son Nhat International Airport in Saigon, happy they safely made the journey with me, knowing I’m about to see the smiling  faces of my Gia dinh that su cua tôi (true family members), I can’t help but yell “Toi eu Viet nam! Toi eu Viet nam” (I love Viet nam! I love Vietnam!) because of what Vietnam has meant to me. And the people always laugh a little, and I always cry a little, in a good way, just like I did for that vision long ago, the one that brought me here in the first place, will always bring me back, and revealed to me that Vè tinh thân, tôi la nguõi Vięt Nam, that in the Spirit, I am Vietnamese. Hẹn sớm gặp lạii (see you soon) Chao tam biet (Later). 

On Saigon and The Hai Houc (Comedian) Phuc Nguyen

On Saigon and The Hai Houc (Comedian) Phuc Nguyen

SAIGON1.jpg

The story below was written in 2018, in the good old pre-overwhelm days, when I like to imagine suffering over not enough going on at The Higher Haven was so much more pleasant than suffering with way, way, way too much going on. “Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’ For it is not wise to ask such questions.” according to Ecclesiastes 7:10. Regariding Good News, the good news is I’m writing this preamble from Phon Penh, Cambodia, over 8,000 miles from South Haven, Michigan USA. Regarding betterment, happiness, and transformation, I’m pleased to report that the healing provided by the great land of Vietnam just about a year ago has been wonderfully, joyfully confirmed. While all that settles, let me introduce you to one of the forces of light I discovered in a far, far-away land, on the other side of the world actually, Noon in Vietnam being midnight in Michigan EST. The Secret King of the modern day people of Vietnam I like to call him, the honorable Nguyen Ba Phuc, my Ban, good friend and Kola, who opened up the world of Southeast Asia and its ancient healing ways to me almost twenty years ago.

Behold morning at the Cái Râng Floating Market in Cân Tho, center of the Mekong Delta, 200 kilometers outside Saigon city, Vietnam. Cái Râng translates to Teeth of the Crocodile per the mighty Phuc Nguyen, the dude on the right leveling a shot off the bow of that boat like Quint the shark killer. Mr. French Indo-China circa 1954 I call him, a nickname I find très apropos, as it references the time his Viet ancestors sent their French colonizers packing at the battle of Din Bin Pho. Phuc (pronounced Fook) Nguyen (pronounced Win) is a name akin to John Smith in the states. But in this case, it’s the common name of a very uncommon man. Over ten years ago our paths crossed in a hotel lobby in Ho Chi Minh City, the modern name for Saigon honoring the country’s iconic leader. And while the entire span of our friendship consists of hanging out for a few weeks total, some of the best days of my life have been in Vietnam with Phuc as my right arm. He’s my Nguoi an hem tinh thân, My Brother in the Spirit. After reconnecting excitedly at the airport, we jumped in the car and took one another in. “Hmmm Paul, the last time I saw you, it seems you were in the desert, crossing a great desert. But now, it seems as if… you have found the water.” 

That’s one of one thousand dien (crazy) cool Phuc Nguyen-isms. Check my Facebook photos around 2008 and you’ll see a picture of Phuc on the machine-gun range at the tunnels of Cu Chi, a section of the immense network of tunnels that underlie much of Vietnam. My private guide that day, he recounted some incredible - and incredibly dark - history from the American War, the name VN people dub the conflict. The caption to the photo reads: This is when I realized Phuc was a Genius. As soon as we were together in the car on Wednesday, the jokes flew, prompting me to ask: “Phuc how do you say Comedian in Vietnamese?” He laughed – hi hi hi is the way they script laughter in VN– informing me that, “Haì Huõć is like the professional comedian. But Vui Ve is the funny man.” Being so Pro and at the same time so demure, Phuc embodies both. “Paul, you have no idea how many times I have heard the tourist call to the home and say, ‘We have a Vietnamese comedian for a chaperon’”. The language being totally tonal, he speaks in a croaky, sing-song voice that escalates musically. and lends itself to funny interpretation.. Phuc doesn’t say “Ok Ok”once or twice when he understands what you’re trying to convey; he says it seventeen times, “Ok, ok, ok, ok, ok, ok, ok (etc.). When I start echoing him and we get going, it rises into a chorus of OK’s and laughter, a concurring wellspring of joy that can fill the South China Sea. 

Three things define Phuc Nguyen, three things that, in my mind, define most Vietnamese people: humor, humility and class. On my second visit, he asked, “Mr. Paul (the respectful name he used for me prior to our friendship), I have the question for you: Why is it the Westerners all come here looking like such slobs? You are well-to-do people, so why can’t you put on a collared shirt?” I looked down, considered my ripped-up Replacements T-shirt, Adidas shorts and flip flops and replied, “Let me give that thought and get back to you Phuc.” We enjoyed a visit to a wonderful, peaceful farm after the floating market where the owner-family often finds petrified bombs in their surrounding fields. Phuc’s spontaneous bit - one of many that has me never underestimating the caliber of his creative contributions - had me holding one of the disarmed shells while he interrogated me, asking, “So your people dropped the bombs on us, and yet here we are this afternoon serving you a nice lunch.” His other routine had me hoisting old weapons from the American conflict, while he joked, “no matter how great your arsenal, against the Vietnamese con gai (girl) you will lose, you will surely meet defeat” Leave it to a seasoned Vietnamese funny man like Phuc to turn total tragedy into pure comedy, a stand-up man in every way. 

‘Neath all the laughter, Phuc’s understanding of Vietnamese history, culture and spirituality played a big part in my personal transformation and ongoing quest for spiritual liberation. The first time I witnessed a funeral, on Vietnam’s central coast, it Blew. Me. Away. A slow parade of family and friends dressed in white rather than black follow the hearse, an ornately decorated, golden vehicle covered in dragons and other mythical creatures, all followed up by a New Orleans-like jazz band of drums, trombones, and trumpets blaring out unharmonious, happy tunes. Phuc observed my wide-eyed take of the scene and said, “Ah, the Paradise Car.” “Do they call it the Paradise Car?” I asked “That’s so cool.” “No, no no (etc.), they don’t it the Paradise Car,” he replied. “I call it the Paradise car.” After visiting temples and introducing me to the country’s colorful 54 tribal groups along with their myriad of religions, offering alms and releasing small birds from cages as a gesture toward liberation, I asked, “Phuc, tell me. What do you believe?” I still hear his deep, croaky reply. “Mr. Paul, I believe it all.”

As to the spiritual source of my connection to Vietnam, God only knows. I jokingly like to think that having been born April 8th, 1967 at 3:12 pm in Detroit, Michigan, USA, perhaps nine months earlier a village idiot met his demise in the mountains near Sapa, Vietnam . I’m finishing this story now at a café in Ha noi, beginning the day with a visit to pay respects to the great Ho Chi Minh, lying in state at Lăng Chủ tịch Hồ Chí Minh, the marble mausoleum serving as the revolutionary leaders final resting place. Well protected by a military honor guard with adults and many school children lined up for hours, cameras and photos are strictly prohibited. While It’s a solemn, honorable, contemplative endeavor, the creator in me couldn’t help being inspired by a line artistically etched into the entranceway. Unable to take a pic, I made it a mantra as I quietly filed through with the rest of the good Vietnamese people paying homage. Upon passing through the exit way, I quickly texted Phuc.

Me: Khong co gi quy hon doc lap tu - what does it mean.? 

Phuc: Who says this to you!? 

 Me: Uncle Ho, Uncle Ho tells me! (I text this but as I do I’m laughing, imitating Phuc’s sing-song intonation)

Phuc: Nothing Is More Precious than Freedom

 

Shinzen's Final Dharma Talk

Shinzen's Final Dharma Talk

Shin’s Mins (Minions) untangle and free him after his final nightly Dharma talk, commending us all on Work well done.

Shin’s Mins (Minions) untangle and free him after his final nightly Dharma talk, commending us all on Work well done.

When the Buddha wished to praise someone, he had a saying: Kuta Karta Niem – they did what needed to be done. Kuta Karta Niem. They did the work. And so I say to all of you: Kuta Kara Niem (bow). You have all the reason in the world to feel very good about yourselves. Upon leaving retreat there are a lot of things you need to know – especially if you’ve never done or left a retreat before. Big Picture-wise, after a retreat, exactly one of four things happens: (why does this not surprise us) you either get afterglow, aftershock, both, or none/neither. Afterglow -  tranquility, energy, cascading insights, pleasant emotions… more and more that becomes the predictable result of a retreat. However, at the beginning, not necessarily so – there are other possibilities. You could have sort of the opposite of that – aftershock. Vulnerability, disorientation, all sorts of… stuff, bubbling up from the inside because it’s no longer held down by concrete. You become porous in respect to what’s inside and you become porous in respect to what’s outside. My standard remark, only because I have so many times experienced what I’m about to describe myself upon leaving a retreat, I’m shocked to discover the that entire population of North America has become… Insane. I walk into a 7-11, I’m driving down the 405 freeway and one has stop think: they all went crazy, completely berserk, since I was away on retreat? There can be that sense of vulnerability to the outside world. 

In the afterglow and aftershock discussion, there’s only two things you need to know: why it’s happening and what to do about it. Why it’s happening is not because you did something wrong. In fact, it’s a consequence of doing something right. I say this at the end of every retreat, and for many people it’s just words, but at some point you’ll say to yourself, “My goodness, I know now why he says that after every retreat”. First of all, we are in this for the long haul as far as I’m concerned. It’s a life-long endeavor, but doable by a householder. The spiritual path is a sequence – not one, not two, not three, not four, but dozens and dozens and dozens of acclimitizations over the period of a lifetime, to a state that is less fixated and progresslively more attenuated. That is the very meaning of Spirit. Spirit in English from the Latin Spiritus from the Greek Pneuma from the Hebrew Ruach And it means Wind! The wind is powerful, but it’s unfixated and attenuated. It is There. But it is not there. 

The LITERAL spiritual path is different from the content spiritual path which is, “I have spiritual images I have spiritual self-talk I have spiritual feelings, in the physicality of in my body.” But the spiritual SUBSTANCE isquite a different thing. And those are the two sides of the spiritual path and of course they both have their validity. But the substance of enlightenment – which is what we’re really interested in, in which the practitioner becomes less and less fixated and more and more attenuated – that takes acclimatization. My Father was in the Navy during World War II and he relayed the saying to me “Getting your sea legs”. When someone is first on a ship, it’s unfixated right? They’re holding on to the railing, they have difficulty walking, and then at some point they acclimatize to the fact that there’s no solid ground underneath them. And then they’ve got their sea legs. This is a little bit like that but even more so. The ground will be ripped away from under you moment by moment, and your being will be scattered to fill the Universe moment by moment. And that takes some getting used to. 

The old coping mechanism which sorta works is to tighten up and turn away. The new coping mechanism is the diametric opposite - open up and turn toward. It’s rather difficult then to avoid the awkward, intermediate steps, and not just once and not just twice. What happens though eventually is that you get so used to it that it’s a non-issue. So if one experiences after-shock, it’s simply of result of that process - the old armor is no longer sufficient to ward off the stings and bites of the material world. But the new coping mechanism - which is that you’re so open and porous   things pass right through – takes a bit to establish itself. What to do about it? Just keep up your four pillars of practice – and you know what they are – organized retreat practice, organized daily life practice, get support and give support. Regarding aftershock and afterglow then – enjoy the pleasant part and you know what to do about the other side. And then the neither. You don’t have to have dramatic things occur on this path to be making progress. Actually, a lot of times, people don’t quite realize how far they’ve gone because they’re acclimatized to that, and then something comes up and they realize, “I really, really have changed.” More killer articles from Shin’s talks and teachings to come, as well as some new stories from the road. For now, Chao tam biet.